Embrace instead the underlying message that treating others in the way they would prefer to be treated rather than the more traditional, and imho somewhat selfish golden rule treat others how we wish to be treated perhaps you will understand why many of us do believe in the power of the platinum rule. Its fun, easy to use, and helpful to anyone whos curious about what makes themselves and others tick. The rules dating book ellen fein sherrie schneider. Completing the platinum rule online assessment only takes 35 minutes to learn what makes you tick. Todays workplace populations include foursoon to be fivegenerations, made up not only of different genders and races but also of people with differing preferences, lifestyles, cultures, socioeconomic backgrounds, religious and political beliefs, physical abilities. The platinum rule personality test paycheck payroll. How much work time do you spend in meetings with at least two other people. T tells someone who is very direct and brief in their communication e engages someone who likes to talk with people and persuade them.
The rule is a good start in terms of respect and regard but it stops short of what is needed today for connection and recognition. Commit to modifying your management style, using the platinum rule, to improve team chemistry and performance. The double platinum rule emphasizes creating value and benefits beyond expectations. This approach is not a quick fix, but is more a professional lifestyle direction that, over time, may become woven into your career fabric. United states department of state public domain, via wikimedia commons imagine that you have traveled abroad and that you are re. Jun 30, 2015 the challenge is to understand that everyone is different and trying to do the best they can with a different set of values. So before i get into the double platinum rule and its implications for creating and delivering an exceptional service experience, lets discuss the first two rules. In some cases the contrarian quotes offers more empowerment for one. The platinum rule more than 70 years ago, dale carnegie s 14week course called how to win friends and influence people became a bestselling book that remained a new york times bestseller for ten full years. Discover the four basic business personalities and how they can lead you to success tony alessandra, author, michael j. But where does it come from and why is it important. The platinum rule is the 11th episode in the third season of the television series how i met your mother and 55th overall. Finally, thanks goes to william moulton marston, phd for his seminal work in his 1928 book, emotions of normal people, and to john geier and others for their work on the disc assessment based on marstons 1928 work. Everyone possesses the qualities of each style to various degrees and everyone has a dominant style.
The platinum rule teaches you how to surprise, not just satisfy, the customer and lead, not follow, the competition. It asserts that people have the right to determine for themselves how they should be treated based on what is true and right for themselves, not based on absolute truthgods laws. But when it comes to having empathy, there is higher ideal we can strive forthe platinum rule. The platinum rule finding your soul real faith, real life. To avoid that, use the platinum rule, which advises, do unto others as theyd like done to them. Ted finds himself attracted to the doctor and announces his plan to date her. Improved relationships create infinite possibilities.
I will attribute my learning to a dr tony alessandra an originator of the concept, as far as i can tell, in this book from 1998. Pdf the platinum rule download full pdf book download. Its when my the platinum rule book came out and thats when i decided to put the paperbased assessment online. The platinum rule is a must read for all of us who want to be better in our interactions with others. Aug 11, 2010 so before i get into the doubleplatinum rule and its implications for creating and delivering an exceptional service experience, lets discuss the first two rules.
Sep 03, 20 leadership and the platinum rule if you are like me, you grew up with the lesson of the golden rule, which taught us to do unto others as you would have done unto you. The platinum rule is a much more empathetic, sensitive moral guideline than its predecessor, the golden rule, which ignores the wishes and preferences of the. The platinum rule how i met your mother, an episode of the tv show how i met your mother disambiguation page providing links to topics that could be referred to by the same search term this disambiguation page lists articles associated with the title the platinum rule. A product of psychological research and practical application, the platinum rule is a proven method of connecting with anyone in the workplace.
Instead, think about the double platinum rule as an opportunity to go aboveand beyond by stepping outside yourself, expanding your focus to include the needs of the. If youre like many of us, youve got planning meetings, staff meetings, project meetings, budget meetings. Improving how you interact with them will translate to more success in your projects and in your overall career. Under the platinum rule we do not assume that our personal needs accurately represent the complex needs of. Discover the four basic business personalities and how they can lead you to success alessandra phd, tony, oconnor phd, michael j. Platinum rule selfassessment platinum rules for success. Option b the platinum rule of friendship with sheryl sandberg and adam grant authors of option b. While that rule is a good start, ive always been a bigger fan of the platinum rule. Moving beyond the golden rule, then, i believe that the platinum rule we should all strive for is treat others the way they want to be treated. It describes your behavioral tendencies in your interactions with others at work and in social settings. In its simplest form, it states, treat others as you would like to be treated. An indisputable business fact is that people do business with people they likewhen two people want to do business together, they dont let the details stand in the way.
I am not well steeped in communication theory or practices and found this book to have several good recommendations in i listened to this book on cd. Learn to recognize your colleagues personality types and communication styles, and adapt accordingly. The platinum rule the platinum rule is a book that takes the other side of our most cherished sayings and proverbs. Mar 15, 2016 customer obsession and the platinum rule. How the double platinum rule can help your career a top career. Tony alessandra phd contributorhappy achiever 1 habit. The platinum rule people first productivity solutions.
The golden rule, platinum rule, and titanium rule navigating the best way to treat others. In other words, find out what makes people tick and go from there. In his book, kerpen quotes a story that dale carnegie told in his book how to win friends and influence people which illustrates the platinum rule. Theres a study that i learned about from one of my mentors, brian little, where people were put under stress. The platinum rule accommodates the feelings of others. Mar 17, 2016 how the platinum rule trumps the golden rule every time. The alternative to the golden rule is the platinum rule. Tony alessandra is the author of a book called the platinum rule in which he describes four basic personality types in business. The golden rule implies the basic assumption that other people would like to be treated the way that you would like to be treated. The idea behind the platinum rule is really quite simple, but must be adhered to in the manner described. The alternative to the golden rule is the platinum rule the platinum rule treat others the way they want to be treated. Thats because there are four primary behavioral styles, each with a very distinct and predictable pattern of observable behavior. You cannot execute this rule unless you truly know what the other person requires, what.
A variation of the golden rule the platinum rule how i met your mother, an episode of the tv show how i met your mother disambiguation page providing links to topics that could be referred to by the same search term. I always thought this was a good lesson because i knew that i was behaving in ways that i expected from others. Do unto others as they would have you do unto them. Everyday low prices and free delivery on eligible orders. The platinum rule says we should do unto others the way they want us to do unto them. To do so, we must learn to view the world as others see it, to adapt our communication style to their behavioral style, to lead others in a way that motivates them to want to. Jul 03, 2017 so, while the platinum rule may seem fairly simple and intuitive, the mark of a true leader is one who is committed to leading with their heart and providing those human encounters for their team to become inspired to bring their best self to achieve extraordinary results. Simply stated, it tells us to treat others as they wish to be treated. The platinum rule argues that you have to adapt your thinking, working and management style to create a diverse team which will create more effective solutions than one with similar thinking styles. The platinum rule selfassessment paper version description. It makes sense, therefore, to like and be liked by as many people as possible. The golden rule is useful in having successful interactions with others, but many have replaced it with the platinum rule. Discover the four basic business personalities by alessandra, anthony j, oconnor, michael j.
How the double platinum rule can help your career a top. Several years ago i stumbled upon a concept called the platinum rule. The platinum rule is widely considered to be a more sensitive version of the golden rule. The platinum rule for team building 1875 disc mastery. Dec 10, 2007 barney explains the platinum rule to ted. Support a respectful workplace with the platinum rule.
At its core, the platinum rule is a way to take you out of the equation, empathizing with others to understand them, building rapport and fostering stronger relationships. Treat others the way they would like to be treated. Now, lets take it a step further and upgrade to double platinum. The platinum rule working with different styles different communication focus different approach to work there are four basic communication styles and ways people approach work. I created an assessment, it was a paperbased assessment. Many of us use the golden rule as a guiding principle in the ways we interact with others.
The platinum rule was posited by karl popper in world war ii in the open society and its enemies. Tony alessandra, best selling author of the platinum rule talks about personality styles in business coaching in this interview see the video below with bestselling author of. That rule seems to avoid the problems with the golden rule, but when you stop and think about it, the platinum rule has even more flaws than the golden rule. That is, i treat customers the way they want to be treated. How i met your mother the platinum rule tv episode.
This handbook is not intended to provide an indepth psychological examination of human behavior. Platinum rule is, do unto others as they would have you do unto them. You cannot execute this rule unless you truly know what the other person requires, what they like, what makes them tick. May 22, 2015 the golden rule implies the basic assumption that other people would like to be treated the way that you would like to be treated. The platinum rule recognizes that people are different, that others may not wish to be treated the same way you do. It is the result of years of reading and recording words of wisdom from the ages, and thinking about other ways of looking at the issue.
I was looking for a book that i could listen to as i drive back and forth to work that would be educational and might help me communicate better at work and home. While you might think that your mother made it up, the golden rule has been around for eons. The golden rule in one of my sessions recently, i asked for the meaning of the golden rule, and someone blurted out, he who has the gold makes the rules. The platinum rule is a much more empathetic, sensitive moral guideline than its predecessor, the golden rule, which ignores the wishes and preferences of the recipients of the behaviour in favor of imposing the givers preferences onto others in a misguided attempt at kindness. Jul 03, 2015 the golden rule, platinum rule, and titanium rule navigating the best way to treat others. The disc platinum rule assembles a number of simple tools that can easily be applied to improve both business and interpersonal relationships. The platinum rule is the single most effective tool for learning how to get exactly what we want in life by helping others get exactly what they want the winwin were all seeking. Thinking we need to treat everyone the same because its fair is one of todays biggest leadership misconceptions. Tony alessandra, best selling author of the platinum rule. The book is generally for managers who want to get more out of their employees. Jan 20, 2012 why do you only consider the business definition of the platinum rule.
Ive been thinking recently about the difference between the golden rule and the platinum rule. These, like any personality categorization, should be taken with the caveat that no one can be described by a single trait. I found prince charming by following the rules and so can you. I used that paperbased assessment with clients all the way through 1996. If you believe that by giving, you also receive, then this is a book that will explain how to kick it up a notch. In this entertaining and thoughtprovoking book, tony alessandra and michael oconnor argue that the golden rule is not always the best way to approach people. Is it really the right thing to do or is it the easy thing to do. Understand and accept differences so you can treat others the way they want to be treated. How the platinum rule trumps the golden rule every time.
The platinum rules works best when its possible to obtain evidence to adapt to another persons style. We all know the golden rule, treat others the way you want to be treated. The platinum rule working with different styles different. The platinum rule provides powerful lifeskills that will serve you well in all your relationships. The platinum rule is a perfect example of the relativism thats rampant in our culture today and its not biblical. But this assumes others want to be treated just like you. So instead of the golden rule, practice the platinum rule. Discover the four basic business personalities and how they can lead you to success by tony alessandra at the local library and decided to listen to it.
United states department of state public domain, via wikimedia commons imagine that you have traveled abroad and that you are reentering the united states through. How could anyone interested in maximum achievement not know the platinum rule. May 21, 2014 the platinum card from american express. Truthfully, it doesnt matter which rule you use, as long as your motives are right. Once completed, you will receive your indepth platinum rule report. When it comes to a successful job search, you dont have to put everyone else above you. The platinum rule shows you how to transcend technology and get spectacular results with people. The platinum rule divides behavioral preferences into four personality styles. The authors include a section on how to apply the platinum rule to selling, which makes the book quite useful for anyone in a sales position. In other words, you have to treat people the way they want to be treated, not the way you want to be treated. Its origins are likely based in practical strategies for. You undoubtedly learned about the golden rule when you were little.
Have you ever wondered why you hit it off with some people immediately, while with others its like oil and water. Based on the basic concept of mutual respect, it is typically beneficial as a work, personal and life philosophy component. After ted wakes up to discover that he got a butterfly tattoo on his lower back while drunk, he sees a dermatologist to have it removed. A popular variation, commonly called the platinum rule, coined and trademarked by dr. If people dont want to be asked where are you from. In short, the platinum rule allows for individual differences and preferences, and serves as a useful guide for many relationship situations. Living life by the platinum rule means setting aside my own preconceived ideas for what others need and want. Promoting a respectful workplace how do we follow the platinum rule.
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